Drafting Anew

Drafting Anew

49º ~ sun on the path to warming

Today was a bit of new start after last week’s disaster. I had to start a new journal, even though I’d barely written in the ruined one, and I had a slew of recently received lit mags on the desk. While I may want to sit down at the desk and immediately begin to write, my process doesn’t work that way. I need to read for a good half-hour to an hour to settle my brain and get the ground to soften and allow the new shoots through. Today, I read the recent issue of American Poetry Review. Before I get to the drafting, I wanted to share the end of a poem that leapt off the page for me. Joe-Anne McLaughlin is new to me, but has three books I plan to check out. McLaughlin’s poem “Munnsville Sites, Or Why You Should Visit” ends this way: “yellow jackets / harvest apple pulp so sweet, / one bite / could prevent your suicide / for weeks:” Wow!

With that echoing in my head, I felt limber enough to begin staring at the blank page myself. I decided I’d look at my inspiration cards, and it turned out that the first one I looked at (a new one), set me off. I’ve included it here. Sadly, the fish doesn’t make an appearance in the poem. The first line actually arose from a bit of McLaughlin’s bio in APR: “Likewise, she runs… . ” The bio goes on to talk about a summer program McLaughlin runs, but the sound and the rhythm of “Likewise, she runs” spawned the poem that became “The Nature of Conflict.” I took the title and the emotional sense of the poem from the card, and I used the sheep and the bouquet. What I love about these cards is that every time I look at them, I see something new or have a chance to go in a new direction. They startle me out of my poetic ruts, and let’s face it, we all have our own poetic ruts.

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Post in which the Poet Admits to Being a Fragment

36º ~ sun that bodes well for spring

No matter how much I try to slow down, take deep breaths, and really notice the world around me, I seem to remain fragmented, bits of my mind mulling over the home improvements in the works, other bits making sure nothing has slipped through the teaching cracks this morning, a few more bits of gray matter worrying about some family members whose problems I wish I could solve with a magic wand, a scolding bit that chastises me for not writing a poem last week and for not focusing more intently this morning on my poetry world, and bits and bits and bits…

This is week eight of our 16-week semester, and while I have done a much better job of saying “no” and not over-extending myself this spring, I’m still feeling quite rough around the edges.

I haven’t submitted any poems to journals since January. I have a stack of printouts of calls for submissions waiting for me. I even have new poems to send. What is the delay? You can’t win if you don’t play!

~~~~~

Last night, I attended a presentation on The Oxford Project, which is a photo-journalism piece based on the residents of Oxford, Iowa, a tiny, tiny town just west of Iowa City. In 1974, photographer Peter Feldstein set out to photograph as many of the residents of his own town, Oxford, and the surrounding rural township as he could. At the time, he took one single shot of each resident who volunteered and displayed the results in town. Twenty years later, he returned to the project and ended up re-shooting anyone who was still around and willing to participate. He also brought in journalist Stephen G. Bloom to interview the residents and write about their life stories. This eventually turned into a book.

Let me begin by saying, the photographs are amazing records of the changes people go through in a span of two decades. During the presentation, Feldstein and Bloom showed about a dozen of the paired photos with text and talked not only about their process, but also about the people themselves. And this is where I began to have some trouble. Bloom interviewed each subject and then boiled their lives down to the “killer quotes” from the interview, often focusing on the sensational moments in their lives. There was a sense of amazement on his part that folks from such a small town had experienced such “interesting” lives or had such “rural wisdom” to share.

As the evening wore on I began to worry that the audience was not chuckling and laughing with the people of Oxford, IA, but at them. The people in the photos who told their stories to the world were largely working-class men and women, and there seemed to be a sense of them being “Other” as they were portrayed by the text. These are the people from whom I come, my roots, my heritage, and I felt a bit like we were being studied as some “primitive” group. Now, let me say that some of this reaction could arrive from years of having to defend a rural and agrarian way of life in the face of educated urbanites. Yet, I do believe there was a class issue at play. Here were the learned scholars from the University creating art and commentary from the raw material of the joys and heartbreaks of the manual laborers, the hunters & fishers, the house cleaners and veterans.

All of this brought me to the question of artistic responsibility. I do not believe that the purpose of this project should have been to revere its subjects, and I do believe that Feldstein and Bloom genuinely care about these people, but I also wonder how the text in particular might have been different if written by someone from within the group, someone who had grown up among these people. And yet, I do not believe that an artist must be tied irrevocably to his or her own community only. Once again, I remain fragmented.

Posted by Sandy Longhorn
What I’m Reading:  Prairie Fever

What I’m Reading: Prairie Fever

43º ~ sun with high wafting bits of cloud, rain to the south

I’ve been a fan of Mary Biddinger’s blog, The Word Cage, for quite a while now and have enjoyed her poems when I’ve come across them in the journals. However, none of this previous knowledge prepared me for Prairie Fever, Biddinger’s first book, published in 2007 (I know, I know…I’m always late to the party).

While my focus went immediately to the prairie part of the title, it would have been better placed in the fever, for that is what this collection is…feverish. I read the poems in one long torrent of words and was nearly exhausted when I finished. These poems are tightly wound in both language and meaning. One gets the feeling that the speaker of each poem has been waiting a long time to say whatever has been kept still and silent for too long.

Woven of both first- and second-person points of view, I never felt as if I completely knew the speakers or the “you” they addressed. This instability took some getting used to, but the concision of the lines and the surprising twists of language kept me reading long enough to gain my bearings.

Another of Biddinger’s strengths is her ability to weave lyric and narrative, drawing on the most powerful elements of each. Over the course of the book a story develops of the often hard life lived at the edges of a down-on-its-luck, Midwestern town. Throughout the story, the image of the train tracks recurs, almost always with the sense of our being on the wrong side of said tracks or under the trestles where dark and dangerous events occur.

A few examples:

In “Man in Blue,” the speaker describes her skin as “freckled from weeding, bee / chasing, falling down hills // and off cliffs.” Later she speaks of spending the winter “foot-shackled / in a sugar beet farmer’s shed, / forgetting the mending, milk, // other things with soft names.” The poem ends with a blood image (blood and bleeding play a large part in the entire collection): “Ruby / handprints around my neck.” Chilling. Disturbing. Wonderfully wrought.

Here’s an excerpt from “The Twins”:

…There was
nothing left of the night,

only train cars and breath.
They could dust me for prints
and find just fingertip salt and rust.
You were a halo of consonants

in the dull ebb of my pulse.

In one of the last poems in the book, “Coyote,” the speaker states, “I chose you over / all other disturbances.” As a reader who tends to run from disturbances in my own life, I admire Biddinger for giving us poems that rush headlong into the vortex of a not always pastoral and beautiful prairie/world.

Support a Poet/Poetry Today: Buy or Borrow a Copy of This Book
Prairie Fever
Mary Biddinger
Steel Toe Books, 2007

The reference librarian who secretly lives in me Googled “prairie fever” and found this on Wikipedia (not the most reputable of sources, but quick): Prairie madness is a term that describes an affliction that was common in the United States among white settlers of the Great Plains during the mid to late 1800s. Another common (though, technically incorrect) name for the affliction is “Prairie fever.” The madness was a result of the extreme isolation experienced by former city dwellers and farmers more used to hilly and forested country. The affected individual would fixate on the fact that they were surrounded by hundreds of miles of prairie land, with no neighbors or anyone to talk to. When the perceived isolation became too much to bear, mental breakdown would occur. Breakdowns induced by prairie madness often led to starvation and suicide.

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Counting Down

43º and solid, but sheer cloud cover

36 days, 4 hours, and 20 minutes until Opening Day 2010.

Go Cubs Go!

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Bear: 1, Sandy: 0

43º and sun with hazy clouds

I’m giving this week to the Bear, may she enjoy the feast before her. (My bear is an angry, hungry, mama bear.) What can I say…between the grading, the sinus infection that led to a doctor’s visit and horrible antibiotics, and this morning a cat that knocked over my 3/4-full cup of coffee just when I had finally woken up enough to even consider drafting a poem, ruining a library book, a journal, and a sheaf of poems in progress…I’m out. I’m done. So, many apologies to the poetry world, but this week belongs to the she-bear in all her glory.

Sadly, I still must grade more papers today, but I’ll try to keep the bear out of that business, in the students’ best interest.

In the midst of a trying week, I was reminded, however, that my bear is nothing compared to some that other people face. There are plenty of writers out there who don’t have the luxury of three mornings a week to give to poetry due to jobs and families and other obligations, and yet they draft on…my hat is off to them. Then, there is a student of mine, and I won’t reveal particulars in honor of privacy, who is experiencing a tragedy of a violent nature that will prevent the student from completing the semester, when all the student is trying to do is graduate in order to find some hope of overcoming a bad hand already dealt.

Suddenly, I’m thinking of that old camp song & children’s book: “Going on a Bear Hunt.” Gotta go trough it, climb over it, swim across it, etc.

That’ll be next week. As for this week: it’s ate-up.

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Thoughts on Bravery and Courage

29º a good deal of sun, little hope for much warmth despite it

I’ve been thinking lately about bravery and courage when it comes to being a poet. More specifically, I’ve been wondering if I am brave enough, have courage enough, to really be the best poet I can be. Does becoming the best poet involve taking risks beyond those taken on the page?

Dear Reader, I have a darn good life: a loving partner who supports my work, great friends & family who cheer me on and lift me up, a stable job with a stable income, and a room of my own in which to work. As I’ve mentioned here before, I have come to terms with my teaching life and found a schedule that allows me to also focus on poetry. It turns out, I write most of my best poems (those that reach a reading audience in some form of print) in the midst of this stability. This has not always been the case.

I fought for what I have now, taking risks and making huge leaps of faith to get here. Is it okay to settle in and simply do the work? As long as I’m aware of the danger of stagnation, will I be able to ward it off?

Posted by Sandy Longhorn
A Break in the Clouds

A Break in the Clouds

44º overcast with grayish layers of clouds

While it may be cloudy outside my window today, I did receive a little sunshine yesterday afternoon in the form of an acceptance email from the Georgetown Review. Many thanks to Lauren Martin and Steven Carter for sharing the good news with me. It couldn’t have come at a better time, given the string of rejections I’ve had lately. Also, this is one of the newer poems from last fall, so it’s good to know I’m still doing something someone likes and wants to read/publish. Another awesome thing about this acceptance is that I had submitted again to GR based on a handwritten note from Emma Bolden, the poetry editor, on my first submission. She encouraged me to send again, and I did. Usually, this doesn’t turn into a publication, but this time it did (happy dance).

Of course, ye olde rejection machine just couldn’t rest. About two hours after the acceptance, I received a rejection email from a journal for which I had such a strong feeling and good hope. Thanks to my friend Anne for reminding what that great movie The Big Lebowski has to say on the subject: “Sometimes you eat the bear and sometimes the bear, well, he eats you.”

Now, my composition students beckon me to finish grading their papers already!

“The dude abides.”

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Friday Afterword

conditions the same

At the beginning of January, I answered one of Kristin’s questions about how blogging had changed my journal habits. Now, I’ve noticed that since I’ve reached a routine on this blog, my paper journal only comes out on Fridays when I begin a new draft, and I don’t even finish the draft in the paper journal. I write in the journal until the lines coalesce to a tipping point and then I move to the computer to draft it out. My handwriting has devolved and my typing is much quicker. I find I can keep up more easily with the lines forming in my head if I type rather than hand write. Still, I wonder about losing that connection between the body and the mind that Wendell Berry talked about back in the late 80’s in an article I read about his writing practice. He defends the slowness of his process (using a pencil he sharpens with is own pocket knife, only writing by sun light, etc.) as a way to access the muscle memory of his hand, all the way up his arm, through his shoulder and neck to his mind. In Berry’s argument, this type of writing is more organic, more true. I used to believe this wholeheartedly and only went to the computer once I had a complete handwritten draft. My process has obviously evolved and I just wonder what impact that has made on my poems. I suppose this is something I’ll never fully know.

Finally, many thanks to those of you reading this blog! While I know you all aren’t demanding a draft a week, knowing you are out there, Dear Reader, motivates me to be able to write a draft so I can write my weekly drafting post. It’s almost like the expectation of having a new piece to take to workshop even though I don’t share the drafts with you. Oh, and I forgot to say that this week’s draft is titled “Midwest Nursery Tales.”

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Drafting Relieves Grouchiness

41º ~ good sun ~ a gentle breeze at work in the low branches ~ perhaps the last of the snow will melt today

Ah, Dear Readers, thanks for all your well wishes from Wednesday’s post. The headache lingers and if the medicine does not do its work by Monday, I’m probably in for a visit to the doctor. Between the headache, the round of rejections, a long day at school yesterday, and a pile of grading the must be done by Monday, I began the day in one of the worst bouts of grouchiness I’ve had this far this semester. I was sure, sure, sure that there would be no new draft today. I tried to be okay with that, telling myself that I’d always known I wouldn’t get 16 drafts from a 16-week semester, and that I’d have to accept this sooner rather than later.

Still, I took care of the piddling little things on my desk, clicked on my iTunes classical mix, and cleared the space. (I cannot draft while listening to music with lyrics.) I gave myself until 10:00 to try reading and to see if any draft emerged. (Luckily, with the second dose of meds, my headache has been subdued to a dull thudding). I opened up a book I’ve been eager to read: Mary Biddinger’s Prairie Fever. (If I find some time to read it this weekend, expect a post on this fabulous book next week!) I wasn’t fully able to concentrate at first; however, by the third or fourth poem, the music of the words and images started seeping in. I glanced up and saw a photo a great friend had sent of some not-yet-ripe persimmons, and I had a phrase. I jotted it down and returned to Biddinger’s work. I probably read a half dozen or so more poems. Then, out of nowhere, I had an opening line: “In your stories, someone’s always lost amid the cornstalks…” I went back to the book but could not continue reading because more of my own lines started crowding my head. Alas, my persimmon line did not fit, but I’ll save it for another day.

Swiftly, swiftly, the draft poured out. And here, I must pause to thank that editor whose rejection gave me so much trouble last week. I kept his comments in mind, could see that I might have fallen into a pattern of repeated syntax and worked with this new draft to break free from it, just as an experiment. I do not know if this poem has reached its full form. There may be more to add. It needs to sit and simmer a bit. Yet, given the mood I was in when I sat down at the desk this morning, I am celebrating this small moment.

Posted by Sandy Longhorn

Not Right Now, Dear Reader, I Have a Headache

26º and clear skies, the sun already up

The title for today’s blog is not a euphemism. At the moment, there is a blinding ache above, between, and behind my eyes. I know its source; I’ve taken the medicine. So far it has not abated. To make matters worse, it has been nothing but rejection city around here for the last two weeks. I think I’m up to seven or eight journals saying “no thanks” (most of them kindly or in form letter), since my last acceptance. So, I’m having a little pity party for myself right now and then getting over it.

I had already planned a shortened poetry time today given the grading that needs to get done in the next few days. When I realized I’d be writing a short blog today, I thought of the last three lines from Whitman’s “Song of Myself.”

Failing to fetch me at first keep encouraged,
Missing me one place search another,
I stop some where waiting for you.

Until Friday…

Posted by Sandy Longhorn